Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
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