CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
