3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
