Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
