I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
