Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
