woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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