I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
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