margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
