rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
