It's Friday. Sex?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I had to cum in my sink.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
