What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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