He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
