Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
