mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
