I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
