I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
