why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
We need to get me chipped asap
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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