Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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