If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
