Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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