I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I take back everything I said about communal showers
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize