either way he was missing a nipple.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
