My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
