I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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