That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
she looked like the before picture.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
