Fuck appropriateness.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
