We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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