Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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