When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
