He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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