can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
