he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize