do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Randomize
