I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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