so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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