your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize