Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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