We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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