i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
whose parrot is this?
Randomize
