Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Randomize
