what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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