I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
