its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
