Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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