he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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