We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
