how can u be prego again
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
