Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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