1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
